Any way you slice it, the Minnesota Timberwolves are tied for the #1 winning percentage in the league. Top of the heap. The New Jersey Nets and Kevin Garnett have a 0% win record at 0-1. Ouch! The Miami Heat? 1-1. Not good enough for the top, chumps!
Here are my impressions from the first game of the season, other than our glorious, perfect record:
– Kevin Love looks great. He’s in shape and appears strong and healthy. Not only that, but he had 32 points, 17 rebounds, scored the big three-pointer that pushed us into overtime and had zero knuckle pushups. Hooray!
– Our two big new additions, Corey Brewer and Kevin Martin, played big roles. Brewer had 16 points and made some key plays. Martin shot poorly, but he still had 23 points. And when he scored, it was at pivotal times. It’ll take some getting used to his weird slingshot heave, but they usually go in, so screw it. Nobody cares what the cook looks like, as long as the food tastes good. And right now it tastes like three-point gravy and lay-up pizza. I’m so hungry.
– A couple interesting DNPs (Did Not Plays): Shabazz Muhammad and Derrick Williams. I’m interested to find out what Shabazz can do. He’s just a rookie, so I’m sure he’ll get his chance after some hazing. But I’ve seen enough of Derrick Williams. He’s a lemon. We wanted a Dodge Charger and we got a Plymouth Sundance with mothballs in the trunk and Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass in the tape deck. And we’ve already got a “Spanish Flea.”
– Orlando’s Victor Oladipo is a baller. He’s definitely an early front-runner for Rookie Of The Year. Hopefully, Orlando will have a little better luck keeping their #2 pick in a Magic uniform than other famous #1s.
Next up we play the Oklahoma City Thunder at home. Will our record fall by a whopping 50%? Or will be win and remain statistically the greatest team on the planet? To the Target Center!