Derrick Williams Traded For Someone – Rejoice!

Posted: 11/26/2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , ,
Derrick Williams, who struggled for playing time and often had too much glue on his hands, has been traded to the Sacramento Kings. Photo from

Derrick Williams is pulled from a game after accidentally gluing his hand to his jersey.  Photo from

A lot of Timberwolves fans are upset about the Derrick Williams for Luc Mbah a Moute trade with the Sacramento Kings.  Unless those people have a phobia of mispronouncing names, they should just calm down.

Derrick Williams is talented.  Unfortunately, most of those talents don’t equate being a good team basketball player.  If the league had a double-pump contest, or a “Who can make the most bone-headed play immediately after doing something good?” showdown, Derrick would probably win.  Other than that, he was mostly useless to us.  Yeah, he’s talented.  But guess what?  So is every player in the NBA.  If that wasn’t the case then I’d be suited up in my Larry Bird/John Stockton shorts doing whirly-bird hook-shots from half-court.  Another airball!  Where’s my paycheck?  Ca-ching!

Maybe Williams will go on to super-stardom in the happy, functional, mature, totally not cursed, non-violent family that is the Sacramento Kings?  I hope you understand sarcasm, son, because you just got bitch-slapped with it.  This is vicious Western Conference.  Almost literally every team is .500 or higher, while in the East you make the playoffs if you have a pulse and a can name which team Michael Jordan was on.  If you’re not with us, you’re against us.  I hope that DeMarcus Cousins headbutts Derrick Williams and he ricochets into Ben Mclemore, giving them all soap opera style amnesia and they forget how to play basketball.

So how long before we trade Shabazz?

Go Wolves.

"Hey tiny lady.  Wanna sneak into the Rookie Symposium together?" Photo by

“Hey tiny lady. Wanna sneak into the Rookie Symposium together?” Photo by

  1. Adam Svien says:

    Hahaha Mike, I love it. But, will Luc Mbah a Moute be any better than D-Will? I guess the best news is we will save cap room.

  2. bblaw1 says:

    who is upset about this trade? Dwill wasn’t trusted by the coach and only played because of injury. I hope the guy does go on to a good career, but wasn’t happening here.

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