I saw Vanilla Ice perform last night. Check it off on the bucket list of things I never actually meant to do, like graduating college before I was done partying and accidentally exercising. Rob “Vanilla Ice” Van Winkle played for five minutes at the Timberwolves home opener half-time show and threw down all the massive hits. He played a medley of “Ice, Ice, Baby”, “Play That Funky Music White Boy”, and then yelled “Make money money!” while the T-Wolves dancers jumped around for the remaining three minutes. Catalogue complete!
He also wore a Darko Milicic jersey. It’s fitting, considering their similarities. Both were highly-esteemed in their early days for about a week. Both don’t know how to do things very well. The only difference is Darko went away.
Regardless, we won the game! We had a big lead at one point and then blew it away (very Timberwolvesy) but we actually held on to get the W (not very Timberwolvesy). We’ve got a pretty deep bench (not very Timberwolvesy) but we also seem to forget how to score for large stretches of time (super Timberwolvesy). I’m going to say the most Timberwolvesy thing and say that we’ll be fun to watch and that we could maybe make the playoffs this year for once. Now all we need is three more teams’ best players to get hurt and we’re there. Poor OKC.
By the way, I have to call bullshit on something. Someone supposedly taped a Timberwolves ticket to a pole in Minneapolis, then someone found it, took a pic of it and it went viral. I don’t believe it for a second. Some Wild fan did that. Hockey fans are so insecure. They’re so pissed about being the #4 sport in America that they have to talk smack to the NBA. Don’t be pissed at us because half the country doesn’t care about you or your missing Chiclet teeth. You guys are just figure skaters that we let fight.
Next up we play another bitter hockey town (Chicago) at home on Saturday. This is going to be a tough one, but Chicago might collectively step on a paperclip and break their arms off so we have a chance! Go Wolves!